The Art of Giving and Receiving

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21-413 - art of giving and receiving - Adam Wilder
Fri 08Oct
Sun 10Oct

A joyful dive into personal sovereignty & the Wheel of Consent

Facilitator: Adam Wilder

At this weekend workshop, we will learn the Wheel of Consent, a powerful tool to help us understand the unseen dynamics which guide the ways we relate to each other.

We will learn to make clear agreements and get in touch with what we want and how to ask for it so we can create satisfying connections with ourselves, partners, family members and colleagues.

Event time: Fri 8th Oct 2021 at 4:00pm - Sun 10th Oct 2021 at 4:00pm

If you have ever found it hard to say yes to something you want or no to something you don’t, this is for you!

What this Workshop is About

  • Gaining skills of empowerment and communication – noticing, valuing, and trusting desires, having the courage to ask for what we want, and feeling safe enough to receive
  • Waking up our ability to feel and notice what we want
  • Making choices – learning how to choose for ourselves
  • Understanding the dynamics of Receiving and Giving and taking them apart
  • Understanding who is doing and who it is for – because they are different

Four kinds of relating within clear agreements

  • Taking – For our own benefit – doing what we want – while respecting the giver’s boundaries.
  • Allowing – Another to take from us – they do what they want with our permission – while maintaining our boundaries.
  • Serving – Another for their benefit – we do what they want – within our boundaries.
  • Accepting – The gift of another’s service – they do what we want – while maintaining their boundaries.

Unless you take apart and experience each of these four aspects, it is impossible to know what they really are.

Understanding and embodying the Wheel of Consent happens best through a somatic experience – you have to feel it in your skin. Therefore, learning the Wheel happens through touch exercises and lived understanding.

Over 2 days we will

  • Learn what ‘Receiving’ and ‘Giving’ really are – and why knowing the difference is crucial for creating authentic connection and intimacy
  • Find out where we are clear (or not) in Receiving and Giving
  • Learn the framework of the Wheel of Consent® and the four Quadrants as a foundation for connection
  • Experience pleasure and sensation in your skin that you can access any time you choose
  • Access parts of yourself that have been hidden away that are ready to be seen, appreciated and healed
  • Gain skills to bring awareness to your hands so that all your touch is rich and satisfying
  • Become exquisitely aware of your desires and limits and how to communicate them
  • Practice Receiving, Giving and experience each of the four Quadrants
  • There are many opportunities for exchanging touch as part of the learning, but there is no intimate touch and clothing stays on in the workshop.


This healthy boundaries retreat will be based at Hawkwood, where you will be able to enjoy our beautiful grounds. There are residential and non-residential options available.

“Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves, even when we risk disappointing others.” – Brené Brown

More information

You can read Adam’s blog here.

Price Options

££275 Non-residential
££325 Shared Residential
£ £375 Single Residential


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Adam Wilder

Adam is a Human Connection Coach and Comedian, trained counsellor and passionate intimacy advocate.

He is the founder of the Togetherness movement which helps people to wake up their natural ability to form healthy relationships with themselves and each other.

He has trained across disciplines, from counselling to clowning and brings a warm and accepting presence to his work. Recently he has been training with Dr Betty Martin, creator of the Wheel of Consent.

He is known for creating the House of Togetherness pop up in central London, hosting the largest ever mass spooning with 1447 spooners and creating Shhh Dating, the world’s first silent speed dating event which helps singles find love through eye gazing and non-verbal connection games.

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“The best way to describe this course is 'powerful'. I feel awake, alive and on a mission to honour me.”

“The most valuable thing I’m taking from this course is an awareness of my power and my presence. It has given me the ability to lead a life in line with my own truth.”

“I loved the breakout exercises that seem like play but are RICH in the reveal of self. The encouragement to be curious about our experience and the debriefs after were gold.”